The Prinsess Bride (film)

Splendidly silly movie with tons of subtle poke-fantasy-in-the -eye humor!


A Princess Bride Trivia Quiz
Who is the sworn enemy of the country of Florin?
A. Guildenstern
B. Gilder
C. Rosencranz
D. Sean Gilder, aka "Styles" in those Horatio Hornblower flicks

Name the fencing strategy to counter Bonetti's Defense.
A. Cozzi fan Tutti
B. Casablanca
C. Copernicus
D. Capoferro

Finish this sentence: Plato, Aristotle, and Socrates are:
A. Morons
B. Dead
C. Philosophers
D. All of the above

Where was Fezzik the Giant unemployed when Vizzini hired him?
A. Greenland
B. The WWF
C. Hollywood

What are the three terrors of the Fire Swamp?
A. Flame Spurts, Lightning Sand, and Rodents of Unusual Size
B. High property taxes, poor schools, and no garbage collection
C. Mob corpses, Jersey devils, haunting Springsteen ballads

To avoid the first Classic Blunder, you should:
A. Never go up against a Sicilian when death is on the line
B. Never get involved in a land war in Asia
C. Never utter a line from The Princess Bride unless you want to be spouting quotes all day

The Princess Bride was written by:
A. William Goldman
B. S. Morgenstern
C. This is a trick question, isn't it?

Which statement about Westley is not true?
A. He is not lefthanded.
B. He looks great in black, and oh my god, those boots.
C. He kicked Bill Paxton's ass in that tornado movie.

When Inigo meets the Six-Fingered Man who commissioned a sword from his father, he will say what to him?
A. Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
B. Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You left your credit card at my father's sword shop, did you know that?
C. Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. Dude, you rocked in Spinal Tap.

Being mostly dead is:
A. Still a little alive
B. A good tax dodge
C. A nice trick if you can pull it off

According to the Impressive Clergyman, marriage is:
A. A dweam within a dweam
B. A good tax dodge
C. A nice trick if you can pull it off

Iocaine powder comes from:
A. The drugstore
B. Australia
C. That creepy guy on the corner
D. Sweeping the floor of one of Pablo Escobar's factories

According to Miracle Max, if you rush a miracle you get:
A. Rotten miracles
B. Sour wine
C. The Mummy Returns

Where did we leave that wheelbarrow the albino had?
A. Over the albino, I think.
B. Prop storage at Universal Studios.
C. Item #14553246 on eBay.

"As you wish" means:
A. "Hoo boy, that Buttercup is a hottie." --Farmboy
B. "Oh baby, that Farmboy is really cute." --Buttercup
C. "Rotten little kid don't appreciate a thing I do for him." --Grandpa

The correct sequence of Dread Pirate Robertses is:
A. Roberts, Cumberbund, Ryan, Westley
B. Nora, Doris, Tanya, Tony
C. Jason, The Dread Pirate Robards; Tim, The Dread Pirate Robbins; Cliff, The Dread Pirate Robertson; Edward G., The Dread Pirate Robinson

According to Westley, Prince Humperdinck:
A. Is ugly, rich, and scabby
B. Is a warthog-faced buffoon
C. Kinda sounds like that pumpkin dude from The Nightmare Before Christmas

Is this a kissing book?
A. Yes
B. No
C. You know, someday you might not mind so much

ANSWERS
Well, if you don't know, I'm not telling you. You call yourself a Princess Bride fanatic? That's pathetic, that is. I think that's the worse thing I've ever heard. Go watch the film again, right now, ten times, as penace.


Quote:
"Wait! What about the R.O.U.S?"
"Rodents of Unusual Size? I don't think they exist."

Heroes kommer på svensk tv!

Enligt pressen har tv4 köpt in Heroes och börjar visa den i höst på svensk tv. För den lycklige rackare som har canal+ startar dock lyckan ett halvår tidigare - redan nu i februari börjar den nämligen visas där. Missa inte denna spännade serie!

Prospero's Children

av Jan Siegel

Syskonen Fern och Will Capel följer med sin lätt excentriske far ut på den engelska landsbygden till huset han just ärvt av sin avlägsne kusin Ned. Väl på plats i huset börjar märkliga saker hända och Fern och Will börjar så smått inse att världen nog inte är så enkel som man kan tro som rationell stadsmänniska. En man som ser ut som en sten bevakar huset från en närliggande kulle, något mörkt och ytterligt skrämmande sniffar runt huset nattetid och försöker ta sig in, en mystisk motorcykelåkare dyker upp överallt, en stor, vargliknande hund blir deras vän och flyttar in i köket... Och när deras far måste ge sig av till Amerika i affärer och han skickar sin skrämmande flickvän Alys att se efter barnen börjar det verkligen gå utför...

Prospero's Children är en spännande och engagerande historia med inslag av myter och mytiska varelser från många länder och tider. Huvudpersonen Fern är en mycket sympatisk och modig hjältinna som svävar i gränslandet mellan barn och vuxen. Under historiens gång förlorar hon mycket, men vinner sig själv...
Jan Siegel skriver bra och hon har vävt ihop en spännande historia som gör något nytt och fräscht av element många har använt innan. Läs den!

Betyg: 4,5

Valiant – a modern fairy tale

Valiant – a modern fairy tale, by Holly Black **

I read Tithe by the same author a year or so ago and loved it. I am sorry to say that Valiant is pretty much the same story, only without the elements that made Tithe so lovable.

A young girl – Val – runs away from her home and fins some squatters in New York whom she decides to stay with. These three teenagers, Lolli, Dave and Loui, run errands to pay of a debt, but when their customers start dying, they quickly get a lot of nasty surprises.
For one, their dept holder is a troll.
Second, the customers are fairies – mermaids, ogres, and so on.
Thirdly, the ‘fairy dust’ they’ve been delivering has a real kick on humans – it almost makes them fairies themselves. But it is very, very addictive.

This story is trying to be a love story, a growing-up story, an adventure story all at once. It’s...barely making it. Mostly because apart from Val there is no one really likable in this story. Even one of my all-time favourites the now Elven King of the Unseelie Court, Rath Roiben Ray, makes a very bleak (ha! the pun!) appearance.
But I kind of liked the troll Ravus.
Not really worth the effort, but at the other hand the story barely offers any resistance, so any effect of effort is quickly paid of. Buy and read for a train ride, and expect no more, no less.

Oh, yes an other question that begs to be addressed…a lot of people (read: Americans) seem horribly offended by the fact that there is a relationship between an older woman and a teenage boy. He is seventeen. He’s above the age of consent. It’s not a crime. Get over it.
Or at least, be offended by the drug abuse questions, the theft or the lot more squicky relation going down (se below). Honestly, some people…

Spoiler: Highlight to see.
Hmm….in Tithe, the girl gets the elven King. In Valiant, the girl gets the troll. Blacks taste’s are rapidly deteriorating…..

Scraps: And you know the Ring-tequila game? Might be done in this book using the word ‘urine’. Just call 112 first.

More scraps: All the little details, such as referring to Warcraft and (I’m not kidding here) Really supposed to be King, will mean this book is as outdated as I am in just a few years.

A Song for Arbonne

A Song for Arbonne – Guy Gavriel Kay ****

I’ve always considered it a measure of how good a book is how quickly you read it. I read this one in two days and my eyes are still, when writing this, red.
I don’t think there is such a thing as being disappointed in a Kay book. ASfA is not (in my not very humble opinion) as jaw-dropping surprising as Tigana, nor did I cry as much as from The Fionavra Tapesry, but it is still on the very pillars of splendid fantasy. The characters are so real. The plot so very believable. The excitement tangible.
Set in an alternative version of Italy, with the threat of northern countries hanging over it, the story’s winding intrigues and deeply hidden secrets will be revealed during a year that will change the world forever.

It will surprise no one who know me, I think, to learn that my favourite character (whom, btw, do not have pointy ears) is the clever, witty, amusing assassin Rudel Correze. But there are lots of loveable persons here, as well as some ambitious, some weak, some clever, some tricky once. And although, like I said, I pride myself immensely by figuring out a few of the elements ahead of time there are still many that hit me from nowhere. The end, especially.
And for Emilia....I do believe his father lied in the end. I really do.

Not, I would say, Kays best book. But from such an author, that is still saying its cut far above most other work out there. One of this years best reads!

Oh, and on a more personal note….Rebecka, you might not want to read this book. It has lots of those things you don’t like. You know, words that rhyme, and poetry and such…. ;oP

Nightcrawler – the Winding Way

Nightcrawler – the Winding Way ***

Alright, so I’m a sucker for pointy ears. And I prefer my heroes to not be so damn human. What else is new? So, I miss my devilish-trickster. Thus the picture.

In this sort-of-follow-up on The Devil Inside Nightcrawler again has to battle the occult forces of Hell that seem to have some sort of personal issue with the devil-looking mutant. As it turns out, they do.
Tracking his own past with the help of Wolverine (who is really worried about his friend) and nurse Palmer (who still seem intent of getting him in a shower – Kurt, that is, not Logan), Kurt seems to be always one step behind. Some unknown force of evil is going rampant on Kurts past, killing the circus people he used to live with, torturing his foster sister and really upsetting his foster mother. (Not a wise choice, that last one.) But what they really want might be buried deeper than Kurt is prepared to dig…Literally. And in the end, it all comes down to if you’re ready to deal with the Devil or not…for the sake of those you love and loved.

Not so many shower scenes (thank Gods) but an amazingly large amount of strategically torn uniforms. And even more manly angst than in tDI; even Wolverine is scooping it out in this one. The only really fun scene is when Wolvie gets possessed, and his soul gets stuck in Hell. I suppose Hell looks different to everyone.
Snigger snigger.
Following this is of course a splendid scene of Wolvie and Fuzzy Elf bashing it out in a circus mirror-room. Always knew something like that would end in this way, didn’t I? ;oP
Ah well, this was the last of the Nightcrawler albums, although with this ending there is bound to be a sequel (I hope). Now what shall I do? No more pointy blue ears, alas….Hey, maybe I can get a hold on some Gambit albums! Red demon eyes aren’t pointy ears, but in these dull days I’ll take what I can get.
Quote (Wolverine, Gods damn it…):
“You know, the only thing I hate more than light beer is ramping hordes of zombies! ..Luckily, I've got nowhere else to be.”

The first book of Lankhmar

The first book of Lankhmar – Fritz Leiber ****

In the seemingly always misty great city of Lankhmar two most unlikely heroes met for a second and decisive time (don’t ask about the first time they met). The huge, strong, sword-wielding barbarian Fafhrd who is obsessed with civilisation, and small, clever, disillusioned thief Grey Mouser, former wizard-apprentice and still walking a very precocious path between Good and Evil, where not likely to be good friends. But they recognised something in each other, some part that had been missing, and together they would form a faithful but unruly alliance that would make them the greatest thieves - heroes in all of Nehwon.
Sounds like a book for Niklas doesn’t it? ;o) The rest of you, bear with me, please.
This collection of short stories of the massively unlikely adventures is nothing, nothing like you expect it. This is Conan the Barbarian meets Ankh-Morpoc on the rampage.
For starters, they are so stupid. I mean, Mouser is clever, but not intelligent. Fafhrd is book-learned but dense. Their two mentors/employers/slavemasters that they eventually end up in the clutches of are petty and childish. The two women they love (which are only presents in the first chapters, then they die horribly, being eaten by magic rats) are vengeful and spoiled. Everyone in the great city has his or her own agenda, most of which goes completely way-hay.
This is so much fun.
Absurd amounts of riches, gold, jewels and power run through these accomplished thieves (in one hilarious story they actually steal a house) and they loose it just as quick. I thought I had found some great mistakes in the story because the description of their swords and daggers – Greywand, Cat’s Claw, Scalpel – looked different in every story until the author with splendid dry irony told that the two heroes lost, broke, sold or traded their weapons all the time, but with pure stubbornness always called them the same….No sentimental ancestral weapons here!
Magic appears and disappears as it fits the story. They are attacked by watch-leopards, birds, dinosaurs, evil priests, fog, cloaks (!) and a tower (no, not the people in the tower. Attacked by the tower) They are immensely rich – they are so poor they have to sleep in the gutters. They really don’t like killing people, but once they get started….
Reading the entire book might tire the best, but like Gaimans collections, once you’ve read the two first chapters you might jump as you wish. Every chapter begins with a short note on what it is about (also very fun to read) for example: The Sunken Land. Involving the Atlantis of Nehwon – Somorgya. A tale of the wild Outer Sea. Of fishing for fish – and jewels. Of sheer, blond-haired madness. Vast Waves. With some details, though rather few, on how uncomfortable thick, black cloaks can be even for tall, stalwart fighting – men.
Snigger, snigger.
Can be recommended to anyone who likes good old High Fantasy (no elves though, mind you) with a twist.
Quote (a typical debate between Mouser and Fafhrd, although perhaps not typical to most barbarian and street-urchin heroes):
(…) “But before that, he – she, it, they – went through the hidden door.” Fafhrd stated.
“He – she and so forth – named us sons,” the Mouser mused.
“Yet he – consider the other pronouns spoken - had a point.”
“Damn your pronouns! We swore never to return. Have you forgotten that, Fafhrd?”
“No, but I’m dying of boredom. Times I have sworn never again to drink wine.”
“I would choke to death on Lankhmar! Her day-smokes, her night smogs, her rats, her filth!”
“At the moment, Mouser, I care little whether I live or die, and where or when or how.”“Now adverbs and conjunctions! Bah, you need a drink!”

Fragile things – Neil Gaiman

Fragile things – Niel Gaiman ****

Neil Gaiman is like a box of chocolate. You never, ever know what you’re gonna get.
In Fragile Things – Gaimans second collection of short stories – we get it all. The good, the bad, the ugly. The hilarious, the horrendous, the mind-boggling. The sad, the spooky, the serious. (Alright, I’ll stop my alliterations now…)
This really is a chocolate box, to open at random and enjoy – as always with this author. Some stories require a bit of pre-knowledge, like A Study in Emerald, an amazing spoof on the old Sherlock Holmes story A Study in Red. Fortunately for me, I spent an entire summer about fiftteen years ago reading Arthur Connan Doyle. There’s also a very interesting story The Problem of Susan dealing with ending of The Last Battle in the Narnia series, in which the fact that Susan never gets to find Narina again is dealt with (something I also always felt very strongly about). The Monarch of the Glen is better if you’ve read American Gods first.
And some of the poems, especially The Day The Saucers Came are great.
But…but….either I’m getting psychic powers or else some of theses stories has been published before. I know I’ve read Fifteen Painted Cards from a Vampire Tarot before, as well as The Facts in the Case of the Departure of Miss Finch. Can’t remember where or when, though. Might be sneak reads in Hamrelius I suppose.
But if you’re just thinking of reading one of these stories, I must recommend In the End, a one-page story about the last book in the Bible. It really is the choice praline in this gilded box of sweets. Because, great as these stories are, you must read them with some care. ‘Cause like a box of chocolates, if you overdo it, you might get sick.

Quote: That day, the saucer day, the zombie day, The Ragnarok and fairies day....

Dragonheart (film)

eftersom jag inte läst ut en bok på hela julen och det började klia i recensentfingrarna tar jag helt enkelt och recenserar en film istället, nämligen en jag såg härom dagen - 'dragonheart' från 1996.

filmen handlar om den ädle riddaren bowen (spelad av dennis quaid) som tjänar en grym kung, men som genom sitt mentorskap för kungens son hoppas på en ljusare framtid för riket. kungen dör i ett försök att slå ner ett uppror bland bönderna och sonen blir dödligt sårad. för att rädda sonens liv tar drottningen (som är kelt) med honom till en ädel (!) drake (sean connery) som ger honom en del av sitt hjärta för att rädda prinsens liv. bowen märker att prinsen är precis lika ond som sin far och skyller detta på draken och startar nu en vendetta för att utrota alla drakar...

detta är en film som rekommenderades av en an mina äldsta vänner och återigen bekräftas det att vi har diametralt olika filmsmak... ;-)

även om där fanns ljuspunkter tyckte jag inte alls om den här filmen. dennis quaid är en mycket bra skådespelare men som riddare är han ungefär lika övertygande som paris hilton skulle vara som fn-ambassadör. han går runt hela filmen och förvränger rösten så han låter som att han rökt cigarrer och druckit whiskey morgon, middag och kväll i ett par veckor. annars är han precis som vanligt - en helylleamerikansk skådis i en film som ska föreställa engelsk. karaktärerna är platta, storyn tunn och draken är lite småfånig - även om han är rolig ibland. ingenting i den här filmen är trovärdigt och jag kan inte med gott samvete rekommendera den till någon som inte är obscent förtjust i drakar - har du inte sett den - gör inte det!
betyg: 2